RELATION !

i wish that i could start another relation to fill this empty space, but i don't know what was happening to me.
there were many chances came toward me but it seems that i got no feeling to start, too afraid to start and being hurt again, or maybe the feeling itself has gone................
it's hard to believe that i've rejected a girl who wish to be with me, it's not that she's not good enough for me but it's like i don't feel her,
well, she said that we can try to start, but for me it seems useless
well maybe i have to stop all those things and keep the loneliness in my arms, so there will be no more harm for my life

RELEASE !

i don't know what i felt for the last 10 days in my life, it feels like i'm releasing something in my life, but i don't know what was that.
or, maybe it was the pain that surrounding me for being jealous ?
well, i do let that feeling go and disappear from my life, but not to forget it and also forget her.
coz the more i try to forget her, the more i remember and there will be more pain i got in deep of my chest.
i'm not forgiving her, yet,
but someday i hope i can forgive my self for loving her and then forgive her for my own good.

HOME SWEET HOME

crowded in sight, but silence in feel, it was just too many people in this cold lonely place, it's not as usual as i know, coz this place is used to be the place for me to refresh my self, but now it feels like hell to me !
yeah, i've lost many things in this three days event, maybe it's more than i've realize, but my lost is so clear !
well hey, no body cares about that, so then do i have to care about this ?
now i really understand the meaning of

HOME SWEET HOME

Traitors

many things happen in the last three days, it was hurting me more and more. love has clearly betray me, but then i've found that friends has done the bad things to me, they betray me, letting me be in pain without any help
leaving me and support those bitches who wrecked my heart,
damn, i never thought that they really do that to me, but it did happen to me,
see, whatever you say
just GO FUCK YOURSELF.

proud weren't you,
patient is the best advice you gave me that night, yeah, coz you have the same beat with that bitch who took away my precious one, hell yeah i hate you all.

come on, you know about my story but indeed you support them,

where's your heart bro ?

hey folks,, you can put your mind in your ass, that's a better way to make me understand about all those things you did to me !

god still love me

see, now i've realize that what happen lately was the great power of Allah SWT thathas show me the real face of the one i ever believe to be the best for me.
thanks god for making me realize that i was too precious to waist my life with her.
even thought it was really painfull and wrecked my heart, but i know that this is the best thing for me.
and there's one thing for sure,
GOD STILL LOVE ME ! ! ! ! ! ! !

STUPID

The wind blew away my fear,

I'm awake in this loneliness

Missing u is what I felt tonight

But none a little part of me dares to say it,

I'm just here alone !

Why do I seek for the love that I wouldn't ever had from you ?

Why do I still hoping you ?

Why do I love u ?

I can't answer those questions

Coz I have no reason to it.

How do I describe what I felt tonight ?

I'm here like a dumb ass around two couples of love

Stupid isn't it ?

But here I am, a stupid single boy

16-07-2011

02-18 AM

Jarum jam masih tak berhenti menemanku tuk terjaga

Di bagian lain pantai ini, lampu berkilaun silih berganti

Debur ombak memecah keheningan, coba tuk tetap buatku terbangun

Bulan di atas sana seakan mengawasi aku yang sedang kesepian malam ini

Tak seperti mereka di sekitarku, yang tertidur berselimutkan pelukan hangat para gadisnya

Muak aku di tempat ini

Ingin susuri pantai dan tinggalkan kecemburuanku di ruang ini

Berjalan kini ku susuri pantai

Di temani satu nama yang tetap di hati

Ku ambil sebuah ranting kecil yang terbawa ombak

Tulis namamu di atas pasir

Berharap saat ini kau di sini

17-07-2011